One Thing Leads To Another

I was recently watching TV, when I saw a commercial for USAA. One of the actors caught my eye. I knew him! He's actually not an actor, just a USAA member, but was chosen for the commercial because they were trying to represent that USAA passes from one generation to another. His children and grandchildren were also in the commercial. I do not know them, but I recognized Harry right away. He is a 98 year old man, and long time friend of my parents. I hadn't seen him in several years, since my father died, and was happy to see that he is still active and healthy. Seeing Harry reminded me of his past, which I will share with you here. Harry was a doctor, and that most likely saved his life during World War 11. He was in the Pacific, was captured by the Japanese, and as a POW served as the camp doctor. The Japanese needed doctors, so Harry was given extra food and better treatment. Treatment generally was horrific, and Harry was involved in the Bataan Death March in 1942, which historians describe as one of the worst atrocities of the war. Thousands of Philippino and American prisoners died during the 80 mile walk from one camp to another. They were starved, beaten and tortured. Harry survived all this, and went on to live a productive life as husband, father, and doctor. Harry talked very little about these wartime horrors during the time I knew him. He never went into detail, but in recent years he has joined a group of WW 11 veterans who get together to try to resolve old issues. You see, when the men came home from WW 11 there were no support groups, there were no psychological services to help those with PTSD (they didn't even have a name for that yet), and they really didn't have time to work out the psychological effects of war. They were too busy working and taking care of their families. So here it is, 60+ years later, and the few remaining survivors are working through things that have been eating at them for years. Better late than never. Finally, my mom called Harry today, and told him how much we enjoyed his commercial, and just to catch up, as they don't see much of each other anymore. Harry told her that he is the only remaining survivor from his batallion. He was a true hero to the men in his outfit, and remains an inspiration to others. I am privileged to know him.

We're Number One!

So much has been written about the U.S. losing it's number ranking in all areas of education, reading, science and math. Yes, it's true. We now rank as low as #37 in some areas of education, when compared to other highly industrialized nations of the world. But there is one area where we do rank #1, and that is violence from firearms. This is not a statistic to be proud of, yet what are we doing to change it? I have read many articles about gun ownership, gun registration and gun use in the United States, so I will not bore you with statistics. It's enough to say that Americans love their guns, and any talk of gun control leads many to think that the government wants to take their guns away. Nobody I have ever heard has said that. It's all about controling who owns guns, making sure that those purchasing guns have a background check. Most guns used in crimes (robberies, street fighting, etc.) have not been obtained legally, yet the guns used in mass killings have been obtained legally. So it seems to me we need to check more carefully those that are purchasing guns and make sure they know how to use them. Statistics show that if you have a gun in your house you are more likely to kill a family member than a stranger. I will never forget an incident that took place in Los Angeles about 30 years ago. A family in Cheviot Hills had a gun, the father heard someone rustling around in the kitchen in the middle of the night, took the gun out, went downstairs and killed his son. Had he not had the gun, his son might still be alive. I never thought about this when my kids were young, but how many times did I send them to someone's house to play where a gun was present, and possibly available for curious kids to find? I'm sure it happened. If I were a parent of young children today, I would ask that question before sending my child on a play date. I remember when we were in Miami about 10 years ago, driving to a Cuban restaurant for dinner. We were half way to the restaurant when our friend shows us the loaded gun he's got under his seat "just in case." I just about died. He said everyone in Miami has a gun! I don't like guns. The only time I've ever held a gun was in Arizona, when I went on a desert tour that included target practice on a range. Even that made me uncomfortable. I do, however, respect the right of every American who wants a gun, to have one. It's in the constitution, but guns and ammuninition have changed in the past 200 years. We now have high power assault rifles and clips that can fire dozens of rounds without reloading. Was the constitution talking about that when they said we have the right to bear arms? I don't think so. Our country must have a rational conversation on gun control. Why does the NRA yield such power? The NRA just supported numerous candidates in the last election, and none of their candidates won, so where is their power? Who in Congress will stand up and show some courage? Let's find a way to make every potential gun owner undergo a background check. Let's get rid of assault weapons. Let the armed forces use them. That's what they were meant for. Let's get rid of the magazines that allow a lunatic to fire 30 rounds without reloading. More guns in the schools is not going to make our children safer, in my opinion. There was an armed guard at Columbine. It didn't do much good. For the first time in my life I went to the movies,wondering if something like Aurora could happen here. I had never considered going to the movies a dangerous activity, but when I went to San Marcos to see The Life Of Pi, the thought crept into my head. If I'm thinking about these things, so are other people. Let's start talking about this issue, both sides of it, let our politicians know where we stand, and do something about it. We're too great a nation to have to live in fear, to feel we have to walk around with protection. Having the conversation is a start.

How I'm Spending My Birthday

Birthdays with my friends and family are never just a one day event. They last the whole month. Ever since I moved to the San Diego area in 2003, birthdays have always been an extended celebration. One memorable birthday was my 65th (a few years ago). My friend Molly (one day older than me) and I decided to throw ourselves a sushi party at Station Sushi. We invited about 20 people, pigged out on sushi, then ate a wonderful birthday cake. What a great way to celebrate. This year my celebration will consist of several small get togethers with friends, including a Newcomer's picnic for everyone celebrating in February, compliments of Debbie. On the actual day of my birthday I will of course, start out at the gym. That's pretty much the way I start everyday. It's what I love to do, and will take a spin class to start my day. Next, I will go shopping. Ron gave me a gift certificate to Lululemon which I will enjoy spending. I will try to squeeze in a quick trip to the dog park with Pepper. I have a wonderful group of park friends that I've met since Pepper joined the family, and I love to spend time with them. Then, David and Tracy are coming down from LA. We will spend the afternoon with them, then go to dinner at Vintana, in Escondido. What a wonderful way to spend the day. I know I will also have phone calls from mom, Philip and Brian and their families, to make the day absolutely perfect. In addition to all this, I've got a breakfast and a sushi lunch to round out the occasion. February has been hectic. Lucky my birthday only comes once a year!

Is Rooting For The Underdog In Our DNA?

I was at the dog park not long ago, the one in Encinitas at Rancho Coastal Humane Society, and the parking lot was filled with cars. Why were so many people there at 1pm on a Wednesday afternoon? They were there for a birthday party. I couldn't believe the humane society was the site for a birthday party, but there were 14 screaming 8 year olds there to eat, play games, and celebrate someone's birthday. While they were waiting for the party to start, they all gathered around the fence to watch the dogs in the park play. There were three particular dogs of interest. A 60 pound boxer named Chester, a 30 pound mixed breed named Abbey, and a 10 pound puppy named Jesse. They were wrestling, biting, chasing, having a grand old time, the two larger dogs beating up on Jesse. But Jesse fought back, seemed to love the "play fighting" and kept coming back for more. The kids reacted to this dog play as if it were a boxing match. They started chanting, "Jesse, Jesse" and rooting for little Jesse to win the fight. Is it in our DNA to root for the underdog? I thought this an interesting idea, so I went home and researched this concept, and apparently it is in our DNA to root for the underdog. We are genetically inclined to help weaker victims fight back against dominating bullies. It's in our genes to root for our own team, but if you don't have your own team playing, you root for the underdog. All those human interest stories that we hear about Olympic athletes, for example, are about the underdog. Boy from the projects with no father, no money, grows up to be a world class athelete. We all root for that. It's in our DNA, and this little example at the dog park, showed so clearly that this is true. No one told those kids who to root for, but they inherently rooted for the smallest, the lightest, the one least able to protect himself. I found this very interesting.

What Makes You Happy?

Several months ago a few of us bought a Groupon for "Bite San Diego." It's a company that runs culinary tours of various areas of San Diego. For $22 we booked the Downtown/Little Italy Tour. Months went by and we were not able to find a date that everyone could agree on, and so the coupon was expiring and we booked a Friday tour just after the New Year. A fine time. Everyone was getting ready to start their diets, but we couldn't pass up the food tour, so four of us spent an afternoon eating way too much. Although the food tour was great, the best part was being together with friends. Most of us had not seen each other in a few months, due to end of the year festivities, obligations, etc., so we were happy just to be together. As Regina said, it doesn't matter what we're doing, we always have a good time. How can parking your car or moving your car from one parking lot to another be so much fun? I don't know, but it was. We were parked at Horton Plaza, with only a three hour window before we had to pay, so we decided to move the car. We found the car just fine, drove to the exit, then realized we had forgotten to get a validation. So we sent Regina back inside the mall to get the validation, then tried to exit. Debbie put the ticket in the machine, and it said we owed $22. After a long explanation to a voice, the arm went up and we were out of there. Now we had to find another place to park closer to Little Italy. We found a perfect meter, then had to watch poor Debbie struggle to paralell park. She's got lots of talents, but parallel parking is not one of them. Regina and I couldn't keep from laughing. All this to save ourselves a few bucks. So what will I take away from our tour with Bite San Diego? I will remember how full I was when the 3 1/2 hour tour was complete. We started with an Indian buffet at Royal India (very good), then cheese samples at Venissimo (delicious), then on to Berkeley Pizza for three slices of deep dish pizza. I'm not a fan of deep dish, so other than pick the ingredients off the top of the pizza, I skipped this stop. Then it was on to Karl Strauss for beer tasting (also something I skipped), and reparking the car in a better location. Finally, our last two stops were in Little Italy. One restaurant served us a kind of dessert pizza. It was flaky crust on top, nutella in the middle, and crust on top, sprinkled with powdered sugar. Yummy. Finally, we stopped at Davanti Enoteca, one of my favorite restaurants. They served us a thin crust flaky dough, filled with cheese, topped with dough, and served with honeycomb drizzled on top. It was wonderful. I will remember our tour guide Eddie, who was knowledgable and entertaining. I will remember Lynda, Debbie, and Regina, and how we laughed our way through these restaurants, how we talked about everything and everyone, and how we had a damn good time. As Regina said so well, it doesn't matter what we're doing or where we're going, we always have a good time together. That makes me happy.

We've Come A Long Way, Baby

A few weeks ago one of my bridge friends sent me an e-mail showing a dozen or so vintage print ads, most from the 1940's and 1950's. I couldn't believe what I saw. Cigarette ads promoted by doctors, dentists, and even Ronald Reagan. Soda promoted to infants. The portrayal of women, as sex objects, here to serve men, would cause a revolution today. We definitely have come a long way. (Virginia Slims commercial). I couldn't get some other great ads printed, but there was one of Santa Claus smoking, a seductive looking woman waiting for her hubby to return from work and serving him a TV dinner, ads for cruises, telling the consumer they will have a "gay" time. The use of the word "gay" was used over and over again in print ads, which just goes to show how word usage changes. Enjoy these few ads and check out the internet if you want to see more vintage ads, most of which would never be published today. We've come a long way, but still have far to go.

Jobs You May Not See Anymore

As technolgy advances, many jobs are obsolete. Machines have replaced humans in many industries, and jobs shipped overseas have accounted for many lost jobs as well. Here is a list of some jobs that are obsolete, or becomming obsolete. Lector-a lector is a man who would read the newspaper to workers in cigar factories. This began in Cuba, but could be found later in America as well. Elevator operator-remember going to a fancy department store and having the elevator operator announce what clothing or furniture would be found on each floor? That was so much fun, but today elevators are almost all automatic. (I have a great memory of visiting my grandparents in New York as a child, and going in the elevator and cuddling up to all the ladies with fur coats on). Copy boy- really an errand boy, is an obsolete job in publishing, as are many other jobs in the industry. Pinsetter- Manual pinsetting at bowling was what we all knew in the 40's and 50's. Now everything is automated. River driver-these were loggers who would float cut logs down river to the sawmills. No more. Ice man- in the days before refrigeration, icemen were needed. They've been obsolete for years. Lamplighter-before electricity, men would get up on tall ladders and light the street lamps, 200-300 per hour. That too, has been automated for years. Milkman- in 1963 30% of milk and dairy products were delivered by the milkman, now it is less than .5%. Switchboard operators and typist pools are also gone for good. Supermarket checkers are not yet obsolete, but they're on their way. About half of their jobs have been eliminated. Postal workers-many jobs have been eliminated due to automated sorting. Repairmen-specificially for cameras and watches, their numbers have dwindled. Watches are so cheap, most people just throw them away. It's cheaper to buy a new one than to repair the old. This goes for many small household electric appliances as well. Drilling machine operators- their number will be decreased by 26% in the next 5 years, due to a combination of shipping jobs overseas and new technology. We often hear businesses talk about retraining workers because of new technology, and you can see why this is so important. So many jobs that used to require a human, no longer do. I recently took a tour of the Celestial Seasonings plant in Boulder, Colorado. Almost everything is done by machine. There were just a handfull of people overseeing a huge operation. Machines can actually do these jobs better than people, so people must be retrained. Lots of new industries and opportunities, but education is required to retrain our workforce for the next generation.

Having Fun, The Senior Way

Last week I had a few friends over to watch the movie Quartet. I'm lucky to have access to first run movies. My mom still gets some movies that are up for academy award consideration sent to her, for her personal enjoyment, as my dad was a voting member of the academy for decades. Even though he is no longer here, many studios continue to send my mom movies. She thought I would enjoy this delightful film, and I did. As space is at a premium in my home, I invited just a few friends over for an afternoon. We watched the film, ate and talked. We all loved the movie, but more than that, loved being together. We are a diverse group (in interests and background), yet we meld together so beautifully. Jan is a photographer, and through the film she kept asking where it was shot, and I said that it looked like just outside London. At the end of the film Jan commented that there was a tree in the front of the house that did not look like something that would be growing in that part of the world. (Jan is also a horticulture expert). Carol, a former elementary school principal, said , "Oh I noticed that too, and it almost ruined the whole movie for me!" (LOL) We started a really funny conversation back and forth about the tree, and who in the world would notice the tree except Jan? Wouldn't you know, she went home, researched where the film was shot, found out that it was just outside of London, and that oak trees do grow in that part of the world. Just a little example of how we all learned something from one person's attention to detail and curiosity. So why do I call this blog having fun the senior way? Because we have many women in our group that can no longer do the active things we used to enjoy together, like golf, tennis and swimming. One woman has a serious eye condition, another woman, while training for the Carlsbad Marathon, strained her foot and cannot do the active things she once did (for now anyway), another has back problems, and then there's me, with my knee problem. We're a motley crew, but the one thing we can still do is think and talk. We do a good job of both, and because we all have different interests, we all have something to bring to the conversation. You've probably been asked the question "If you had a party and could only invite 8 people, who would you have there?" Well, these women would all definitely add to any party. Smart, curious, funny and non judgemental are characteristics that make them people you want to be with. I recently read that one of the best ways to stay healthy was to associate with positive people. Makes good sense. As we age we need to be realistic about what we can and can't do. Even as our bodies tell us we can't do the physical things we used to, our minds are still sharp as ever, and we can learn something everyday. I've said it before, but I'll say it again. My mom is my role model for aging. She is close to 90 (I hope she doesn't mind my saying that), plays bridge several times a week, goes to theatre, opera and movies, throws dinner parties, goes to art galleries, belongs to a book club and continues to take classes at UCLA, OSHA, and other schools. Don't ask her about current affairs, books, theatre or Wall Street. You could be overwhelmed at what she knows and you don't. Our mind never stops working, so as we age and modify our activities, remember to keep your mind active, and sharing your knowledge and humor with friends, makes senior life so much more fun.

Cranberry Pear Crisp

At a recent holiday party, one of the desserts was a winter cobbler, which I thoroughly enjoyed and thought I would share with you. I make summer cobblers all the time. Berry cobblers and peach and berry cobblers. In the winter I usually make an apple cobbler. The cranberry pear combination is delicious. I love the idea of cutting down on the sugar by using granulated Splenda. Try this dessert while fresh cranberries are still available in the supermarket. Fresh cranberries are not available all year round, so use them while they're available, and enjoy the fresh, tangy taste of a cobbler made with cranberries. Cranberry-Pear Crisp 1 package (12 oz) cranberries (3 cups) 2 large unpeeled pears, cored and sliced thin (or cubed) 1 cup granulated sugar (I've used granulated Splenda and it has worked fine) 1 tsp. cinnamon 1 T. lemon juice 1/4 cup flour, divided 1/4 cup packed brown sugar 1/4 cup butter or margarine 3/4 cup each regular oats(not instant) and chopped walnuts Whipped cream or vanilla ice cream (or cool whip) In lightly greased 1-1/2 quart shallow baking dish thoroughly mix cranberries, pears, granulated sugar, cinnamon and 1 Tbsp. flour and lemon juice; set aside. In a medium bowl mix remaining 3 Tbsp. flour with the brown sugar. With pastry blender, cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Stir in oats and nuts; sprinkle evenly over fruit mixture Bake in preheated 375° oven 40 minutes or until lightly browned. Let stand at least 10 minutes. Serve with whipped cream or ice cream. -- Linda

Escape From Camp 14

In November, 60 Minutes aired a segment on Camp 14, a labor camp within North Korea. I did not see it, but was told by several friends about the horrors that took place there, and how this has been hidden from the Western World (I think even from North Koreans themselves) for decades. I had to look into this, and found the book, Escape From Camp 14, by Washington Post journalist Blaine Harden(barely off the presses), and recently finished reading it. Very little has been written on life in North Korea in general, and literaly nothing has been told of the horrors of life for hundreds of thousands of North Koreans who are hidden away in labor camps for all or some of their lives. The reasons are obvious. Western reporters that are allowed into North Korea are not given access to what's really going on. They cannot speak, photograph, or interview anyone who is not approved by the government, and this can only be done with officials present. The only way to learn about North Korea is through those who have escaped to South Korea, China or the US. There are many of those that have told their story, but none, until now, have escaped from a labor camp. Shin is the young North Korean man that Blaine Harden tells us about, through hours of interviews in South Korea, California and Seattle. Shin was 23 when he escaped from Camp 14, squeezing through an electrified fence, after his friend with whom he was planning the escape, died trying. Shin was burned badly, but because of his dead friend's body where much of the electricity from the fence went, Shin made it through, badly injured, but alive. By stealing, keeping his mouth shut, working, the kindness of others, and a lot of luck, Shin finally made it out. This took several years, with stops in China and South Korea, before coming to America. Why did Shin try to escape, when no one had ever done it before? Prior to meeting Park, the man who he tried to escape with, Shin had never known what the outside world held. Park had been a successful businessman prior to his imprisonment, and enticed him, especially with talk of food. Shin had been born in Camp 14, his parents committing some minor infraction which was punishable by life in a labor camp. Harden's descriptions of the life in a labor camp are hard to forget. Humans are treated worse than rodents. Stealing food is punishable by death. Ratting on others is the norm, even your parents. Shin was forced to confess that his mother was planning to escape. For that she was hung, and he got to watch, but he got to live. Years of his life were spent in an underground prison, in cold, harsh conditions, with no sunlight for months on end. The humanity is taken out of men and women in the labor camps. They no longer feel. They don't feel happy or sad, they never cry. They do not feel love, they do not trust anyone, they do not think about the future because they have no future. For those like Shin who were born in the camp, they have no frame of reference for what the real world actually is. Any news that they might get is propaganda, sometimes years old. Shin decided to take the risk and try to escape after meeting Park and learning about the world outside. He made it, but life has been difficult. Talk about PTSD, his nightmares, paranoia, lack of the ability to touch or hug another human being, have made his adjustment difficult. For a time he was living with a human rights advocate in Seattle, but it didn't last. He has become a worldwide speaker for human rights, telling his stories throughout the world in churches and auditoriums. North Korea is truly one of the most repressive governments on earth. I read a book like Escape From Camp 14 and feel sad, yet I feel helpless to do anything. I fear that in a few weeks I will have forgotten this book and the desperate lives of the North Koreans. Hopefully more shows like 60 Minutes and books like this one, by Blaine Harden, will bring attention to their plight. We, as part of the human race, cannot sit by and watch helplessly as these men, women and children suffer. What can we do?

My Personal Journal

It's the first week in February, and Ron has been home from Taft for 18 months. We don't talk about that period too much anymore, although both of us think of it. Different experiences remind him of that time than me, but it's always going to be in the back of our minds. Another Friday passed, and Ron did not hear from his PO. That means it's been five months since she's called or visited. This is a good thing. Ron is a low priority for her, and in 20 months she'll be out of the picture. We can hardly wait. In the meantime, we had one of our middle of the night talks last week. We woke up at 3am, couldn't get back to sleep, so we talked. I was telling Ron that Linda and Rod's son Corey, will be released from Lompoc in October. They are all very excited, as we are for him, and hope that everything goes well for him when he gets home. Talking about Taft gets Ron thinking about his 19 months there. Which of his friends are still there? Which have been released, and how is everyone doing? Ron said he couldn't believe how long ago it all seemed. Ron's got a great memory, but struggled to remember the names of some of his closest friends there. The mind is so interesting. It blocks out unhappy memories and people, even though you may try to remember. It's a mechanism our body has for dealing with adversity, I guess. Ron's closest friend at Taft was Richard, the CEO of a public company, due to be released in February, 2013. Although Ron has no plans to contact Richard, he can't and would never violate that rule, he hopes he settles back into life in LA and is happy. There will be so many obstacles in Richard's way, as there were in Ron's. The difference is that Richard doesn't have a wife to help him out. He also doesn't have a job, and this is the most challenging task for anyone returning from federal prison. No one wants to give you a second chance. One funny story we reminised about the other night was about the assistant warden. I liked her very much, and she was somewhat helpful in getting Ron released on time. Anyway, after Ron left, she evidently got herself in a bit of trouble. She was out at a bar in Taft and was drinking and carrying on with one or more ex Taft inmates. Apparently the "affair" with one of them had begun while he was in prison. How they managed to do that is beyond me, but they did. Perhaps she called him into her office, so they could have some private time. This is frowned upon. She was immediately removed from her position, and no one seems to know where she went or what happened. My guess is that she was moved to another facility where no one knew her past. These administrators who are in charge of enforcing the law are breaking laws all the time. Sometime I'll tell you about female guards and the carrying on they did with some of the inmates. I don't think it will surprise you. All in all, things are good. Health is most important, and we both work on that everyday. Work and business is not what we want, but we're always trying. Great mom, children and grandchildren, what more could we want?

Thinking Outside The Box

I admire people who think outside the box. They're not afraid to say something that's not popular. Some may find them "weird," but I admire them. They're the ones that always came up with an odd ball answer in class, and surprised both teacher and student. They're also most likely to be the innovators and inventors of tomorrow. I'm often at the gym and someone will ask me about my knee. My answer is usually the same. Nothing's changed. I've been to 5 different orthopedists, had 2 knee scopes, and there has been no improvement. I tell people that ask, that until I discover a doctor that "thinks outside the box" I am not going to any more doctors for this issue. Do doctors listen? I'm sure some do, but I think many look at the X-rays and offer just one approach. Sometimes I think they need to listen to the patient, and think about other issues that may be causing the problem. No one's been able to do that for me yet. Rock Center had a most interesting segment in January on a unique doctor that truly thinks outside the box. He is Dr. Eric Toppol, and he's right here at Scripps in La Jolla. He was formerly at the Cleveland Clinic, but was let go from there because he did think "outside the box." He has modified his I phone so that it can monitor his diabetes, do an ekg and ultrasound in seconds, take blood or saliva samples right away, and many other features I'm unable to explain. Imagine going to the doctor, him ordering an ultrasound for you, and doing it right there in the office in seconds, just by placing the cell phone on your body! Then the result is right in front of him and you in seconds, and he can discuss the findings. No need to make an appointment to go to a lab to have the test done, wait days or weeks for the results, then go back to the doctor for the results. This can all be done on the spot and discussed with the patient right away. Do big pharmacies or the makers of medical equipment like this use of the I Phone? Of course not, they'll lose millions in sales. This is definitely the way medicine should be practiced in the future, but whether or not big business will let it happen is another story. They may crush this, just like they crushed the electric car in the 1980's. You remember when they smashed all the electric cars and put us 20 years behind in the development of these cars. The battery and oil companies did not want the car to succeed, and when they saw that it might, they destroyed them all. Thinking outside the box is a good thing, but unfortunately for us, big business doesn't always see it that way. They're only interested in the bottom line, and if it isn't good for them, no matter how good it is for humanity, they will fight it tooth and nail. We must allow these thinkers to present their ideas and let everyone benefit from their thinking.