How You Look Says Alot About You

Ron just returned from having coffee with an old friend. Ron commented on how sad he was for this man, for his life had no meaning. He doesn't work, he has no hobbies, and few friends. In addition, he is unkempt. I said to Ron that I thought a man or woman's personal appearance says alot about their self image. It has nothing to do with the cost of a person's clothes. It has to do with the person being clean, having their hair combed, and looking neat. You can wear jeans and a tee shirt and look fabulous! Did you ever go to the racetrack and see people that we used to call "racetrack bums?" When I write that now it doesn't sound very nice, but that is what they were called.(and I knew many of them). I conjure up in my mind a picture of a man (sometimes a woman) with sweat pants that don't fit, and a stretched out tee shirt, possibly with a hole or stains on it, unshaven for several days, and messy hair. Go to the grandstands at Santa Anita someday and you'll see what I mean. Or go to a casino here in San Diego, and you'll see similar people playing poker, craps or blackjack. They seem to take no pride in the way they look, and to me this means they don't feel very good about themselves. I think about some women I have known in the past who have stayed in pajamas and a bathrobe all day more often than not. They have nothing to do, nowhere to go, no reason to get dressed. My mom has worked with seniors for many years, and one of the most important things she has learned is that people must get up every morning, wash themselves, put on make up (or shave), and get dressed. This sets the tone for the day, and if someone just lounges around the house in pajamas, they will never get out and into life. One of the most important things in life is to have purpose. I like to keep my calendar full. I like to know that I have something planned everyday. The examples about the racetrack and the casino came to mind because it is at these establishments that you will see many people who seem not to take care of themselves. I'm no psychologist, but it makes sense to me that if you don't take an interest in your physical appearance, you probably don't think much of yourself. I was waiting for the library to open the other day, and there was a man fitting the description I have given above, waiting there too. I wondered why he chose to look like he did. He had a beard, hair that looked like it hadn't been washed in weeks, dirty shorts and shirt, and sandals. He was smart, very smart. He was talking about everything from politics to philosophy to books. I couldn't figure out why he looked the way he did. I think he had made a conscious choice to look this way. Why, I don't know. Maybe low self esteem, maybe something else. In any event, I think that most people that look this way, don't feel very good about themselves. Ron's friend and his appearance may be keeping him from enjoying life to the fullest. It's sad to see.