A Perfect New Year's Eve

I've never been much of a party girl, and New Year's Eve especially, was never my thing. Get all dressed up in something uncomfortable, go out and spend a lot of money on a dinner that's not so good, and probably drink way too much. I'd rather stay home. Ever since David was born, New Year's Eve has been a stay at home event for us. When our children were young, we gave our housekeeper/nanny the week off between Christmas and New Year's, so we decided that staying home would be best for us. We might invite another couple over, have a great dinner and some champagne, and wrap up the evening by 11pm. We've been doing this for almost 40 years. So what's my idea of a perfect New Year's Eve now, that I don't have any children to care for and we can do what we want? My choice is to be home, just the two of us,(as we have been for the last 40 years), for a wonderful home made dinner, a nice bottle of wine, and a movie. That's what we'll do this year. Now all I have to do is prepare the meal, which I enjoy doing anyway. Here's what we're having: gravlax and dill sauce (appetizer), simple salad with vinegrette dressing, barbequed lamb chops, sauteed kale and mushrooms over brown rice, and a nice bottle of Malbec wine. Dessert will be gingerbread. Yum. I'm hungry already. To all of you, celebrate in whatever way is best for you, but be careful out on the road. There are so many crazys. I was discussing New Year's Eve with one of my kids, and we determined that once you have a wife and/or family, you're partying days on December 31 are over. Everyone just wants to stay home and enjoy some quiet time with family and a few friends. My kids that used tolove to party, now want to stay home. Funny, when you've got what you want right beside you, there's no need to go out looking. I've got Ron right here. Why would I want to go anywhere else?

Eggnog Pie

One of my favorite holiday drinks is eggnog. I just like it plain, with no alcohol added. Thick, cool and creamy, I only drink it in December, and only a little bit. So what should we do with the leftover? Why make something else rich and decadant, of course. I hate to throw anything anyway. Remember, Americans waste over 28% of they buy. This recipe has only 6 ingredients. You can make it extremely easy by using a store bought pie crust, instead of making you're own. The store bought crust is very good. This recipe is adapted from a Whole Foods recipe. In case you don't check the Whole Foods web site and blog, you're missing lots of great recipes and healthy cooking ideas. I check it frequently and have added new healthy salads to a long repetoire of favorites. Here's an eggnog pie recipe to keep your family happy through the end of the year. Happy New Year! Eggnog Pie Ingredients: •1 (9-inch) unbaked pie shell •4 large eggs • 3/4 cup sugar(to cut calories, try half sugar, half splenda) •1 1/2 cup eggnog •1 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract • Freshly grated nutmeg (optional) Method: Preheat oven to 350°F. Line pie crust with parchment paper or foil, fill with pie weights or dried beans and bake 15 minutes. Remove weights and continue to bake 15 minutes longer or until lightly golden. Let cool on wire rack. Meanwhile, in a large bowl, whisk together eggs and sugar until blended. Add eggnog and vanilla and whisk until well combined. Pour into pie shell. Bake pie until just set (still jiggling slightly), about 1 hour. Pie will puff while baking and settle upon cooling. Cool completely to serve. Slice and garnish with nutmeg. Nutritional Info: Per Serving:250 calories (90 from fat), 10g total fat, 4g saturated fat, 135mg cholesterol, 150mg sodium, 34g carbohydrate (1g dietary fiber, 24g sugar), 6g protein

The Power Of The Voice

I was recently in LA to visit my mom and help Tracy and David with some wedding stuff. After a delicious lunch at Le Pain Quotidian in Brentwood (I had the Mediterranean plate and Mom had quiche) we came back to Mom's house. She had just received a short CD of Les Miserables, as an ad for the upcoming movie. We put it in an old boom box to play it, only to discover that the tape was blank. However, we discovered a tape in the boom box that is priceless. My parents spent quite a lot of time with my kids when they were young. Before they were in school, the kids went to Grandma and Grandpa's on Mondays. This often involved a Sunday night overnight, so they spent some great quality time with their grandparents. One of the favorite things my parents would do with the kids (usually one at a time), would be tape record their voice. The tape we found is a treasure trove of memories. The tape begins when David is around 2 years old, and has bits and pieces of activities, recitals, conversations, and graduations, all the way up to age 14. What a find. We sat there for over an hour listening to the tape, smiling and sometimes crying, with the memories created by this little bit of celluloid. The most memorable part of the tape was a 10 minute segment when David, age 8, is describing a day at Olympic Boys and Girls Club, a summer camp he attended for several years. Off the top of his head he tells about everything he did at camp from the moment he was dropped off, until pick up time. He describes each activity in detail, with no stammering for a word or idea, just like he'd written out the script. Also on the tape was David, pretending he was performing at the Music Center, playing the piano. He would introduce himself, then play the piano. As a wonderful pianist, he also played the piano at all school events, from the time he was about 8 years old, so we have a lot of school programs on tape. Finally, he would practice reports for school in front of his grandparents, and it reminds me of how very accomplished he was at a young age. The other wonderful piece on the tape was my mom, dad, and David reading books together and just talking. David was about 4 at the time, and my father was reading to him. It was wonderful to hear his voice, so loud and strong. It was almost like he was in the room. But it was also sad, as it was almost 4 years to the day that we attended his funeral. The voice is the most powerful reminder of people, I think. Much more than a photograph. Photos are great, and everyone today has thousands of pictures of their children and grandchildren, but don't forget to record their voices. You forget things, precious moments, and the audio tape brings them back. I am calling my kids today to remind them to tape some moments like the ones I described above. Years later everyone will look back with great fondness at these memories.

Dogs Make Everything Better

The horrific event that took place at Sandy Hook School, in Newton, Connecticut last week has been difficult to think about, much less write about. What could I say that hadn't been said a million times before by those more eloquent than I? So I've been quiet, trying to process it all, grieving for the families that will never see their precious children again and for the faculty and staff that died trying to protect our youth. How do the families of Newtown get through this tragedy? Loving families, clergy, and grief counselors will help some, but the loving hug of a dog will also give great comfort. Days after the shooting, I saw a picture of a man sitting on the edge of his pickup truck with his bulldog. He was holding a sign that said "My bulldog gives hugs." I guarantee his dog has given many hugs this week. There is nothing like the hug of dog, his warm breath on your neck, his sloppy tongue giving you a kiss, that makes evrything better. Dogs understand. I'm no psychologist, but I know that whenever I have felt sad, my dog knows, and reacts accordingly. Now there are numerous dogs in Newtown, helping to calm children and adults alike. Dogs have taken their place alongside grief counselors in these tragic situations. They truly are man's best friend. The shooting at Sandy Hook raises the urgent issue of gun control, and if we are ever going to feel safe again. Over the same weekend that these massacres took place, there were at least 5 other shootings, most ending in murders, throughout the country, including one at Fashion Island in Newport Beach, where 50 rounds were fired, but fortunately no one was hurt. What is wrong with people? There are so many factors that play into the violence of Americans, it is difficult to know the cause. I feel compelled to write about gun violence and gun control, but the topic is complex, and I will wait for another time. It's enough to say right now that "guns kill", and assault style weapons kill more. We as a nation must have the conversation and work on fixing the problem. All we can do now is hug our children, keep them close, tell them we love them, and think about how to solve the problem of violence in America. Oh, and don't forget your little four legged friend who asks so little from you, yet gives so much. He's always there to make everything better.

Romanian Jews Without A Home

I'm in the process of reading an excellent book, A Secret Gift, by Ted Gup, for my Monday book club. The book is about Sam Stone, a very successful owner of men's clothing stores in Canton, Ohio during the depression. He wanted to share his success with those less fortunate, and gave money anonymously to many poor citizens of Canton during 1933. His roots, however, were in Dorohoi, Romania, a fact that he hid from family and friends alike. The book referenced the plight of the Jews from Romania, which I knew nothing about, but was so interested that I researched this little known pocket of anti-Semitism. I always think of Hitler's Germany when I think of anti-Semitism, but the Romanians were way ahead of Hitler. As early as 1880, the Romanian

government began passing laws that marked them as "foreigners" and "aliens," and ostracized them from the community. In the late 1880's Hungary began tightening an economic noose around its Jews. Laws were passed that barred Jews from working as peddlers or shop owners, and made it illegal for them to sell flour, sugar or other staples. In 1898, new laws were passed that placed a quota on the number of "aliens"-Jews- allowed to attend schools. In addition, Jews could not vote or obtain licenses. Agriculatural and economic reversals turned their Gentile neighbors against them. Jews became targets and scapegoats of the state. In 1900 things continued to deteriorate. Jews could not own land, they were barred from living in rural areas, and were subject to a quota that required that two Romanians be hired for every "unprotected alien," (a thinly veiled reference to Jews). Jews faced homelessness, hunger and depression. They were entitled to none of the civil rights accorded those considered true Romanians. Because of this treatment by the Romanian government, Romanian Jews were facing extinction. The U.S. Secretary of State John Hay described the plight of these Jews this way: "by the cumulative effect of successive restrictions, the Jews of Romania have become reduced to a state of wretched misery. Shut out from nearly every avenue of self-support which is open to the poor of other lands, and ground down by poverty as the natural result of their discriminatory treatment, they are rendered incapable of lifting themselves from the enforced degradation they endure." The Jews that fled Romania became known as fusgeyers, or "foot-walkers." They wandered around Europe aimlessly looking for a country that would accept them. Many of them finally ended up in America, thanks in great part to the work of John Hay, but they were often looked down upon, even by other Jews. Jews have been persecuted for thousands of years, but this was something I had not heard of before. Exact statistics are difficult to come by, but around 400,000 Jews left Romania during the years 1880-1903. At one time Jews were 5% of the Romanian population. Today, about 6,000 Jews remain in Romania, mostly in urban areas. Another sad chapter in the history of the Jewish people.

Christmas, 2010

It's been almost two years since I spent what I thought at the time was the loneliest Christmas ever, but in retrospect was one of the best. That was the year Ron was at Taft. Christmas was the eleventh month of the nineteen months we spent apart. I met some amazing people in the nineteen months I was alone. Carole, Linda and Rod were three of the special people I grew to know and love during this time. Carole is married to Michael Santos (released in August, 2012, after over 25 years of incarceration.) We drove together to Taft every Friday during the summer and fall of 2010, and became very close. Through Carole I met Linda and Rod, whose son is serving a nine year sentence at Taft. Linda and Rod live in Bakersfield, about 30 minutes from Taft. They visit him weekly, although now he has been moved to Lompoc (about 2 hours away), and will be released in 2013. Anyway, back to the story. Because of Linda and Rod's proximity to Taft, Carole and I would often overnight at their house when there was a free visiting day. Free visiting days were usually Mondays, like MLK's birthday, so we'd go up on Sunday, spend some time with Linda and Rod, and visit our hubby's on Monday. Carole and I were invited to spend Christmas Eve with them, then visit our husbands on Christmas Day. We did, and it was one of my most memorable Christmas' ever. It was a wonderful Christmas for me, even though I was without my children, grandchildren and mom. The five of us had a spectacular dinner, cooked by Linda, and a decadant dessert, also made by Linda, that I can still taste. It was a recipe from Ina Garten, which consisted of meringue, whipped cream and fruit. After dinner we watched movies, opened gifts and stockings, again prepared by Linda, and talked about our families. It was a happy time, a sad time, a nostalgic time. I still think about that Christmas often, and am thankful that I was able to meet these three wonderful people that helped me through a difficult time. Carole and I are both with our families this year, and Linda and Rod will have Corey home next year. I know that can't come soon enough for them. Christmas day, 2010, I left Bakersfield at 7:30am and headed to Taft. I wanted to get there before the crowd, as Christmas is one of the busiest visiting days of the year. Ron and I talked for hours. I didn't want to leave that afternoon, but knowing this would be the one and only Christmas we would spend apart made it easier. Finding the good in a bad situation is sometimes difficult. Luckily I met good people to help make the bad times better, and Christmas, 2010 turned out to be one I will never forget.

Easy Gifts Anytime Of Year

Around the holidays I think about homemade gifts for friends and family. This year I made 9 fancy scarves, and gave all but one away. They're simple scarves made from Starbella yarn, which creates a beautiful fluffiness to a basic scarf. I also made some homemade chai tea, packaged in small plastic holiday containers (available for $1 each at Dollar Store), and ready to drink by just adding water. Delicious. Here's another homemade gift good for giving anytime of year. I have only made the salt variety, but I know the sugar variety is equally good. Peppermint Foot Scrub (sugar or salt based) 1 cup sugar or kosher salt or Epsom salt works well too

olive oil to moisten several drops of peppermint essence food coloring (red) if desired. It looks better with food coloring place the sugar or salt in a bowl. Add enough olive oil to moisten the mixture, then add peppermint essence. Finally, add food coloring until the desired color is achieved. I like a pink color. This scrub can be made with other essences, like lemon, orange or eucalyptus. Add food coloring like yellow for lemon, etc. I packaged the salts in a small plastic container which I bought at Dollar Store. They were decorated with a holiday theme, but you can get the plain ones, and just tie with ribbon. The salt and sugar scrubs are great for home pedicures, or use in the bath as a scrub for your skin. You'll pay high prices at bath stores for these products, and they're so cheap and easy to make at home. Any hostess would love this gift. Enjoy.