Moving To A New Community Is Hard

It's been almost 4 months since I moved to Ocean Hills.  Things are getting easier, more familiar, and I am more comfortable.  I know I'm just 8 miles from my last home, but everything is different.  A different market, a different Starbucks, and a different Target.  These are places I frequent regularly, and I need to get to know the new baristas and checkers.  This all takes time.  Another place I used to go everyday was the Encinitas Y.  That is no longer possible.  It is more than 12 miles from my house, and 20-30 minutes, depending on traffic.  Right now I'm struggling to get there twice a week, so my guess is, that within the next two months, I will drop my Y membership.  I have a free 24 Hour Fitness membership and a free Pure Fitness (now Crunch) membership, and lots of activities at Ocean Hills to keep me fit.  I will dearly miss the many friends I have made at the Y over the past 10 years.

Everyone is very friendly at Ocean Hills.  Even some people that you think my be grouches are welcoming.  I'm not sure why this is, but it's very different than any community I have lived in before.  My neighbor Bill brings the trash cans in for everyone on our cul-de-sac as soon as the trash is picked up.  He also buys lottery tickets for several families on the block, myself included.  I'm a $16 winner so far.  Max, our local handyman, will help with any small project we need.  Everyone tries to help each other.  It's a great feeling.

I found when I first arrived, that although everyone was friendly, I was having trouble making friends, if you know what I mean.  I solved this problem by getting involved in various activities, and found a common bond between myself and the people in the groups that I had interest in.  First, I started going to the dog park, a two minute walk from my house, every afternoon around 4:30.  There's a group of regulars, anywhere from 4-15 people with dogs, who meet and mingle everyday.  I know all of these people well now, and have made a few friends.  I started pickleball lessons about a month ago, and have met some wonderful people through that group.  I even played in my first tournament last week, a novice tournament, with many of the nubies to pickleball.  The hiking group has also given me a chance to meet and connect with some new friends.  We often walk in two's, and through the course of a hike you get to know a lot about the person you've been talking to.  I just started golf, and I can see that I will meet an altogether different group through my Tuesday golf game.  Bridge and Friday morning discussion are the other activites Ron and I have tried, both of which have introduced us to many new friends.

Living right across from the clubhouse and pool area is fantastic.  Almost every night we walk about 30 feet to the Jacuzzi.  It's almost like having a Jacuzzi in your own backyard.  This is another opportunity to meet and talk to just a few people.  It's very relaxed, and we've met some wonderful people while sitting in a hot tub.

It's hard to come into a new community and try to fit in.  Groups are formed, and some groups are more welcoming than others.  Fortunately, most of the people here are welcoming and want to meet new people.  Ron is planning to go to the Yiddish club next month.  You don't have to speak Yiddish, but I'm sure he will meet many Jews there.  The best way to fit into a new community is to get involved.  Try as many activities as you can, and see where you fit.  That's the best way to find your niche.  I plan for this to be my last home, so getting involved is important.  With over 1600
 homes in Ocean Hills, there are bound to be people of all kinds.  I will just keep trying.  Friendships don't develop overnight, but I think I'm well on my way to finding some people I really like.