I'm Back

 It's been almost three months since I posted my last blog.  A lot has happened.  I thought I would never feel like blogging again, but here I am.  I will try to find relevant events to comment on.

Ron passed away on Thursday, June 18.  (If you look at my last post, it was published on June 26, written several weeks before Ron died, when I was in the midst of a very difficult time, and couldn't find the will to write anymore).  Since early 2020 I had noticed him declining.  Part of it was ALS, but I knew something else was up.  He had lost a lot of weight, was having terrible stomach pain, and had lost his appetite.  Because of Covid-19, it was difficult to see a doctor in person.  We had our 50th Anniversary Party on March 8, just days before our state was closed down.  Ron was thin, but so happy that day, smiling almost non stop for three hours. 

It wasn't until late May when doctors started returning to in person visits that we were actually able to see his gastroenterologist in person.  X rays were taken, and around the 10 of June Ron was diagnosed with metatastic liver cancer.  

I knew that his illness would be short, but still struggled with what to do first.  My three sons were a life saver.  Everyone of them, in their own way, helped me.  Philip was able to drive here and spend several days helping me get the house reorganized for a hospital bed, hiring extra nursing care, and getting hospice here to take over his care.  Thank you, Phil.  You are a great decision maker!!  David flew here from Colorado to help too, going through sports memorabilia and other personal items that I was having difficulty sorting out.  Brian and his family came down, and took care of all his business files.  I wouldn't have been able to figure that mess out without him.  Thank David and Brian, for your help and support.

From the time hospice came on board until the day Ron died was only 9 days.  He died peacefully on a Thursday night.  Thank goodness Dan, Ron's caregiver, Pepper's dogwalker, and our dear friend over the past 5 years, was here with me.  The end of a six year decline had finally come.  

As Ron said, he wasn't going to let ALS get him, and he didn't.  He died of cancer.  In all honesty, this was a better way to end.  It was peaceful, relatively painless, and quick.  When I think about what might have been, I am grateful.

So here I am, alone (with my sweet Pepper), dealing with the death of Ron and Covid-19.  I am doing fine, feeling in many ways, relief.  Much of my pain from lifting wheelchairs, etc. have disappeared.  It is, however, a difficult time, as it is for most of us.  I am trying to put a life together as a 75 year old single woman.  I will figure it out.  I always do.  

(Sorry this is so long.  Future blogs will be shorter, but I had to explain why I've been gone so long.)