Online Dating: What An Education!

 The last time I went on a date was in 1969.  Boy, have things changed. You met someone you were attracted to, he called you on the phone and asked you out, and you were in business.  Today, if you're over a certain age and are not into the bar scene, meeting men is difficult.  So, like many women, I decided to try online dating.  

There are many on line dating sites, some better than others.  I have found that the bigger sites, like Match.com, are better for me because there are more men to choose from.  Today you need to fill out a profile, entering your age, education, religious preference, political preference, hobbies, interests, and much more.  Then you have to get at least one good picture of yourself to post.  It's a lot of work.  Then comes the hardest part, reading through the dozens of men that meet some of your qualifications and see who is likely to be interesting.  

Some men have very specific qualifications, like you need to live within 20 miles of them.  Some men want a younger woman, a petite woman, an athletic woman.  Some men want a woman who will be with them all the time, others want an independent woman with a life of her own.  All these things that people are looking for today that we never even thought about 50 years ago.  I'm so confused I feel like giving up.

I met one man who sounded great on the phone.  We laughed, thought similarly on many issues, and really seemed to connect.  Then I found out he was broke, lived in a broken down trailer park about an hour away, and had no friends.  Even having a great connection wasn't going to lead anywhere with this guy!

Another guy told me he was 70 years old, but when I met him he looked to more like 85.  I was stunned.  Why lie about your age like that?  He took me to Starbucks for coffee, but never offered to buy me anything to drink.  After a 15 minute meeting at Starbucks, he took off, telling me he was going dancing!  This was at 4:45 in the afternoon.  What's with these guys?  I'm still out there, still looking.

  T

Here There Are Blueberries

 I'm sorry I saw this show at the La Jolla Playhouse on it's last weekend, because I would have told you how riveting and important this was so you could have seen it before it closed.

Is there any more to say about the Holocaust?  Yes, there is, and "Here There Are Blueberries" has a lot to say.  All I can say is this:  If you find this show anywhere nearby, run, don't walk to get your tickets.  Simply done, with minimal sets, no costume changes, and only 90 minutes, you will be engaged from start to finish.  I hope you get a chance to see it. 

How Do Butterflies Mate?

 I never thought about this question until recently.  We have established a monarch butterfly sanctuary in Ocean Hills.  It is an area set aside to help this endangered butterfly thrive.  Two of my friends are intimately involved in its success, and they're doing a great job.

Diane came into the dog park one afternoon (we meet there most days to solve the problems of the world!!) with exciting news.  Rona had videotaped the mating of two monarchs!  The video is 8 minutes long, too long for this blog, but I have included a short U-Tube showing the mating process.  Careful, you've been warned, it is X rated.

I was exhausted just watching the process.  Apparently the butterflies can engage in copulation for as long as an hour.  No wonder they have such a short life span.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLBJFAHJ5gE

I was unable to pull up the video, but click here and you should be able to view it.  Pretty interesting.

You've Heard Of FOMO. Do You Know About JOMO

 I wrote awhile ago about FOMO, or fear of missing out.  Some people are afraid of missing any activity with friends or family, which often keeps them from enjoying anything!  I was recently at a WW meeting (Weight Watchers) where we discussed.  FOMO can create stress.  You're not enjoying your breakfast with friends because you're concerned about whether you'll have enough time to get to your yoga class.  You're not enjoying Happy Hour with a group because you've got a 7:00 movie scheduled.  Do we really have to do everything.

Then Melanie, our WW leader, talked about JOMO, or joy if missing out.  Relieve the stress.  Don't schedule so much in a day, and enjoy what you're doing.  Linger over a second cup of coffee at breakfast with friends.  Give up the yoga class for a day.  They'll be another one tomorrow.  JOMO takes the stress and anxiety out of doing too much.  It allows us to enjoy the choices we make and to be present and connected with what we are doing, not worrying about getting to the next event.  Those things will all be there another day, and we will be happier and healthier limiting our activities so that each one is enjoyed to its fullest.

Red Cross Gives Home Fire Safety Tips

I was at a health fair in July, and the Red Cross had a booth, telling visitors that they would come out to your house and install smoke detectors.  I thought that was a great idea, so I signed up, and about a month later, the Red Cross came to my house.  They will install a minimum of one smoke detector on each floor of your house, but recommend one smoke detector for every bedroom.  That's what I did.  I also had them install a carbon monoxide detector in the den.  I'm all set.  The batteries in the smoke detector should last for ten years, but they advise checking them once a year.  The carbon monoxide batteries have to be changed every year, or whenever the damn thing chirps.

Besides installing these life saving detectors, the two gentlemen that came over, gave me great information on fire safety, escape plans, safety checklists, and wildfire safety checklists.  Here are a few things I learned.

Every home should have a home fire escape plan.  Your family should practice your escape plan at least once a year.  The goal is to have everyone out of the house, including pets, in two minutes.  Practice makes perfect.  

Everyone in your home should know two ways to escape from each room.  One might be crawling out a window, another might be a door.  Yes, if your life depended on it, you could get out the window.  Make sure the window can easily be opened.  I had a dresser in front of the window which I have now moved.  If you hear the smoke detector go off, get low and go!  Decide with your family where you will all meet once outside.  Do not go back in the house.  Call 911 AFTER everyone is safely out of the house.

I was also given information on how to keep my home safe, and what to do in case of a wildfire.  Great information, and thank you to the Red Cross for providing this service.  It is probably available in your area too.  Just call your local Red Cross office for more information.

 

Alaska's Glaciers Retreating At Record Pace

 When my mom and I recently cruised in Alaska, she was remembering the way the same landscape looked 25 years ago.  She kept saying, "Where are the chunks of ice in the ocean, where is the calving of the glaciers?"  The answer is that they're gone.

Alaska is on pace to break their record for warmest year.  Alaska's glaciers account for far less than 1 percent of the world's land ice, but their melt contributes 7% of the water that is raising the world's sea levels.  The local impact is great.  Glacial melt affects salmon-spawning streams and harms marine fish and animal habitats.  It is creating new lakes where ice used to be, and outburst floods from those lakes are happening more frequently.  

Changes in the glaciers and the ecosystems they feed has been so fast that they are hard to track.  Glacier after glacier is melting at record levels, pouring waters into rising global seas.  Just an example of the drastic melting is Kenai Fjords National Park.  There, Bear Glacier, a popular tourist spot, retreated by nearly a kilometer in just 11 months!!!  Hopefully the new bill passed by congress to address climate change will get us back on the right track.  Let's hope it's not too late.

Depression In Seniors Is Common

 Clinical depression in seniors affects about 6 million American age 65 or older, yet only about 10% get treatment.  The likely reason is that older people often display symptoms of depression differently, and many clinicians read the symptoms of depression to be the result of drug interactions or the effects of multiple illnesses, and may not treat the depression.

Depression in older adults is tied to a higher risk of cardiac diseases and of death from illness.  Depression reduces an older person's ability to rehabilitate.  Studies show that nursing home patients with physical illnesses and who also have depression have a greater likelihood of death from those illnesses.  Older people may exhibit depression in one or more of the following ways:  tired, trouble sleeping,  grumpy, confused, struggle to pay attention, not enjoy activities they used to enjoy, move slowly.

Depression, and as a result suicide, is higher in people 80-84, more than twice the general population.  The National Institute of Mental Health considers depression in people 65  and older to be a major public health problem.  

Risk factors for depression in seniors include being female, single, unmarried, divorced or widowed.  Physical conditions like stroke, hypertension, diabetes, cancer, dementia or chronic pain can further increase the risk of depression.  

A primary doctor should regularly ask questions to check for depression, and treat accordingly.  Many drugs are available that may help depression, in addition to psychotherapy and support from friends and family, or support groups.  Left untreated depression at any age will not end well.  There is help for those with depression.  It's a matter of finding the right treatment.